I’m still feeling pretty pooped today. Who knows what’s going on with my body, but I figured I would try to get my morning pages down as soon as I can and spend most of the day recovering. Nietzsche had some sort of sickness most of his life that left him only to be able to write a couple of paragraphs at a time. I wonder for how long it was going on before he thought anything might be wrong. Maybe I have a sickness, I’m pretty sure I have something like pneumonia, but that’s another story and probably not what I’m feeling today. I want to say that I feel slugish because the weather, but it feels like something more. Anyway, as I said I’ll put an emphasis on recovery today because I can see myself crashing around the corner. Last time I saw it coming I wasn’t really able to prevent a crash though it was manageable. Like always I probably didn’t give myself the rest I needed and we’ll see if I’m able to take care of myself today. My mind wants to do anything and everything, “The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.” I have two different people living inside of you? One says lets push the limits and see what the world has to offer, while the other says to calm down and take things one step at a time.
My wife gave me a plant for a Christmas plant yesterday. There’s actually two in there and in a couple days I’ll separate them, I just want to give it some time to acclimate to the new surrounding before stressing it out again with a repotting. I also brought in another one from the greenhouse for my sad plant series. I’m very lucky to have my wife. I don’t know why she wants to give me things, but they are nice to receive. I wish I was good at presents. I guess they’re more of a modern idea in the sense that life gets more comfortable so we have to create new jobs which comes in the form of making and distributing of consumer goods. Since I strive for a simple life where a person spends most of their time preparing food and staying warm, goods don’t make sense to me. Obviously I’m a hypocrite because I buy fast food and have a heater in my house, but that’s because I’m human and the easy path is there. Those same instincts get indigenous peoples into trouble when introduced to these luxuries. Again the spirit is willing, but their bodies have a lower tolerance for things like refined sugars than someone of European decent where people have been eating it for hundreds of years. This is also why we must be wearing of technology, no one knows the effect of social media on the body after 20 years of it.