Mess up your makeup

Horseradish flowers

We’ve made it through another day. I was feeling pretty low yesterday and nothing really got accomplished. Maybe the days are feeling like they lag because we’re in the middle of the month. Right now an edge to grab onto is only getting further away. I’m going to put an effort into reading more. It doesn’t take the same sort of energy as going for a run or making a painting and it’s bettering myself. Less than a decade ago I had probably read between zero and four books over the course my life. I decided that I wanted to read more, so at a set time of the day I would sit in my chair and read. I’d read until I got a headache and around that time I started dating my wife. She told me the headaches could be cause by needing glasses. I got glasses, my headaches were gone, and I’ve since read a lot of heavy books. The point is I had to make it happen. The ability to read was a skill I had to work at, I even read a 1940’s book called, “How to Read a Book”. If I would like to read more now, it means I will have to go through a similar process of building myself up. As much as I wish I could, I can’t flip a switch to spend all my time on one activity and be great at it. Last night I was looking at myself thinking this isn’t like me. I don’t want to waste a second of life, there’s an endless list of books I want to read and now I have plenty of opportunity. The strange times make it hard to think about improvement, for weeks maybe even months now, I’ve only been concerned with getting through the days.

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